Dust | Poetry Breakdown

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Under the same atmosphere,
the same stars, 
I would find myself searching desperately for a shooting star
to send my hopes, wishes, and dreams.
I carried them for miles and
as my feet grew tired,
I looked up at the night sky less –
rather than being a comforting shroud,
the night became like a looming shadow instead. 
The sun became hot and blinding.
The rain drowned and washed me out.
The wind toppled me over. 

When weather is just a routine from the Earth’s
diligence in motion,
my bitterness shaped from carrying my hope,
seemed all for naught. 

I constructed rules that were meant to bend expectations
but all I could think about was “what for”?
What for, what for, what for…
For what purpose does this all amount to
if I’m the same stuff as stars?

“What is the meaning of life?”

“What is my purpose in life?”

“What’s the point of everything?”

These heavy questions may either spark fear or curiosity whenever you hear them. No one is really comfortable being launched into existential questioning because it can either launch you into spiraling inferiority or paranoia. It feels like the more you dig, the more questions you seem to accumulate than answers.

On February 14, 1990, the NASA spacecraft, Voyager 1, took this photo.

Pale Blue Dot

Carl Sagan, the late Cornell astronomy professor, gave this powerful speech that both validated and humbled our existence. Everything that we worry about is contained on that “pale blue dot” so in retrospect, why does it all matter? We are just so little so we shouldn’t allow these things to plague us and take away our enjoyment for life.

It doesn’t mean that you should blatantly disregard everything and make an excuse by saying that “it all doesn’t matter anyway so why put in any effort?”. It’s the fact that we are so insignificant that we should be grateful of the life that has been given to us. With that perspective, everything doesn’t feel so heavy anymore.

In my poem, it’s basically a journey of going from infinite hope to hopelessness to applying gratitude over hopeless yearning to isolate the purity of hope. It’s very easy to be caught up and blinded by your own bitterness, making every negativity more magnified. It takes a genuine conscious effort to be aware of your own impact on others and yourself as well as seeking out the good.

You’re doing great & you should be proud of how far you’ve come.

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