Hello everyone! It’s Poetry Breakdown time!
I once wrote a poem
when it was 5 am
because my mind was swarmed with
flies buzzing about- speaking of
what once had been.
In an attempt to match the noise inside my
I gathered them up and threw
them against the page forming
rounded and jagged statements
which had somehow fit in there.
The sun peaks over the horizon
just as I began to peak over sanity, but fear not
for I have structured a puddle of my mind
into competent letters which do fit
inside this head.
I didn’t actually write this poem at 5 am, but I did write a poem when it was 5 in the morning. I was on a class trip and after a long day, I had trouble sleeping and I woke up at 5 in the morning and the sun was starting to come up. Everyone in the room was still asleep of course and I knew I wasn’t going to be going back to sleep anytime soon, so I decided to make use of my time. I wrote the poem on one of those free pieces of stationary that you get at hotels. I wrote this poem based on what I was feeling at that moment. I have to admit that this poem feels slightly dramatic when in reality, I was felt quite peaceful and a little annoyed that I woke up at such an inconvenient time.
The poem starts off kind of simple. “I once wrote a poem/when it was 5 am…” Then, I wrote an analogy to all the garbled thoughts in my head by comparing them to flies. Flies are obnoxious bugs and they always fly around your ear while buzzing just to drive you crazy. In the next sentence, I try to write my thoughts out to give myself relief from my thoughts. The last sentence talks about how as the sun rises, I’m tired, but glad that I’ve settled with the thoughts inside of my head.
Writing this poem was a result of not knowing what to write for the prompt that day, which was 5 am. I knew I wanted to incorporate sunrise in the poem, but I didn’t want it to sound too sappy and longing. Instead, I went for disorder with the unusual usage of adjectives and imagery. Disorder is prevalent in the piece, but it also has some sort of rhythm to the piece. I also didn’t care too much about my overall structure of my poem and how it sounded. When I wrote it, I didn’t think it was too great and now I consider it one of my favorite pieces.
Thank you for reading this week’s poetry breakdown. I’ve actually written this in April for the 30/30 Poetry Challenge. I’m currently working on a poetry series called Colors which is basically a poem about every color and written in the format of “Green”
I hope you have a nice day!
PS. I publish Poetry Breakdowns every Thursdays at 2:30pm EST.